March 9 @ 1:18am

This is my axe, Carla. She’s shiny and pretty. She glimmers like a bazillion rubies basking in oh-so ethereal god-light… or she would if I ever got her on a stage…

I’m destroying my fingers right now to try and feel even close to ready to do something like that. MOTIVATION. It’s returning as winter is leaving. This proverbial revolving door is annoying the shit out of me, but at least I’m on the up-swing at the moment. Also, I’ve always been sort of afraid of revolving doors. I’m convinced one day I’ll hesitate and then get crammed in between the wall and the door and that my body will crumple into some cartoon-like shape and I’ll die a really stupid death. And then I’ll forever be remembered as “that one girl who died in a revolving door”. Coincidentally, this is exactly how I feel about my personal inspiration/motivation/creativity - that one day I’ll start spinning around and never get out, which would of course result in the implosion and disappearance of my soul. Duh.

Anyhoo, it’s time to get shit done. No more wallowing. No more whining. No more heavy sighs.

FIGHT!

This is my axe, Carla. She’s shiny and pretty. She glimmers like a bazillion rubies basking in oh-so ethereal god-light… or she would if I ever got her on a stage… I’m destroying my fingers right now to try and feel even close to ready to do something like that. MOTIVATION. It’s returning as winter is leaving. This proverbial revolving door is annoying the shit out of me, but at least I’m on the up-swing at the moment. Also, I’ve always been sort of afraid of revolving doors. I’m convinced one day I’ll hesitate and then get crammed in between the wall and the door and that my body will crumple into some cartoon-like shape and I’ll die a really stupid death. And then I’ll forever be remembered as “that one girl who died in a revolving door”. Coincidentally, this is exactly how I feel about my personal inspiration/motivation/creativity - that one day I’ll start spinning around and never get out, which would of course result in the implosion and disappearance of my soul. Duh. Anyhoo, it’s time to get shit done. No more wallowing. No more whining. No more heavy sighs. FIGHT!